Talking about Math Acceleration is hard
People's perception about math acceleration can make it hard to talk about
People accelerate their kids in all kinds of things all the time
Nobody bats an eye when a parent talks about how much their kid loves [type of sport] and how they're putting them on the travel team and doing extra practices on the side.
Nobody bats an eye when a parents talks about how much their kid loves [type of dance] and how they're putting them into extra classes and are aiming for regional recitals.
Nobody bats an eye when a parent talks about how much their kid loves [musical instrument] and how they're doing extra lessons and are joining groups to try to get to regional/state competitions.
Nobody bats an eye when a kid is lugging huge books to class and recess and the parent tells you how many books they read over summer vacation.
However, when I open my mouth to talk about how my kid enjoys doing math and we're thinking of giving them more math, then it gets conspiratorial.
The math acceleration conspiracy
What? Why would you give more math to your kid?
When your kid(s) loves math and you want to figure out if/how to accelerate their learning it can often feel like you're walking on thin ice when you mention it.
If you talk to a parent whose kids don't love math, they often think you are judging their kids.
If you talk to the school about math acceleration, they often don't understand why you want to do this and will push back (heavily).
If you talk to a parent whose kids are older, they often think you are coming at it from a "getting into a good college" point of view.
If you talk to an adult who didn't like math growing up, they'll say I hated math and make the conversation about how they hated math.
If you talk to an adult in a field not math related, they'll often tell you how well they've done without needing math.
So I go out looking for math-y folks and it doesn't really get any better.
Talking to the "competitive" math-y parent
Some math-y folks get it, but then it becomes a competition.
Oh, your kid is in [grade] and doing [# of grades above] work?
Yeah, when mine was in [grade] they were doing [# of grades above (more than yours)] work.
Now instead of talking about the advantages and disadvantages of doing more math, we're now comparing notes about who is doing more and where and why.
Talking to the "I didn't accelerate and my kids did fine anyway" math-y parent
Some math-y folks get it, but then it becomes about their parenting style.
They decided that while their kids did like math, they didn't want to pressure them and they turned out (are turning out) fine anyway.
Now instead of talking about how they helped their child pursue their love of mathematics, we're talking about laissez-faire parenting styles and why they think that's the best approach.
Talking to the "you should accelerate more" math-y parent
Some math-y folks get it, but then it becomes about how you are actually not doing enough.
For every resource I am aware and can share in the conversation, their kid has done it, mastered, and moved on to the next (2, 3, or even 4) resources I've never heard of.
They know all the tutors, math circles, and organizations in the region and even a few that are only open to a select few.
This is my favorite type of parent because you can learn so much from them, but then I go away feeling like I'm a bad parent because I'm not doing enough.
Talking about Math Acceleration is hard
What I/we have found to be helpful is to have all these hard conversations and deal with how people perceive/project a context into our questions.
Then we compare notes and figure out our own way.
Which can be lonely.